The Last Three Days (Part IV) – An Untold Story

by Cosmic Panda

This story that I’m about to share with you is something I’ve never told anyone. I am ashamed. But I owe it to you, my readers, you deserve the truth.

I fell asleep after crying on the bed that afternoon. When I woke up, the room was dark. I checked the time on my phone and it was 8PM.

5PM in Singapore is like 3PM here, and 7PM is only when it starts to get dark.

I forgot to take my contact lenses off, so my eyes hurt a little bit. Partly because I slept with them on, and mostly because my eyes were swollen from the crying.

I got out of bed and went to the roofdeck of the hostel. There, it was movie night. All the backpackers were watching Hangover, using a projector. Everybody from all over the world was there. They were all laughing. There was also free food, and that made me happy.


I received a message from Paul asking me where I wanted to go clubbing that night. I didn’t want to see him.

I stayed and watched the movie, even though I am not a fan of Hangover. I finished 3 bags of chips and 2 cans of beer. And half a pack of Marlboro Lights.

After the movie, some of the people there invited me to go out and have dinner with them and I said yes I would follow. I just had to help the staff with getting the projector, and the chairs fixed.

“That was a great movie!” I told her.

“I know right! Its so funny!” she replied.

“So do you always have movie nights here on weekends?”

“Well, we try to do different activities every weekend. And today was movie night!”


“Yeah last weekend we had barbecue night.”

“OMG I would have loved to have been there.”

“Hahaha yes that was really fun.” “Hey uhm didn’t you check out last Wednesday?” she hesitantly asked.

“Yes, I went to Malaysia with..” I couldn’t say the word boyfriend.

“… a friend.”

“Oh I’m from Malaysia! Where did you stay there?”

“We stayed at Kuala Lumpur with another friend for a few days, and now Im back here!”

“Until when are you gonna be here?” she asked.

“I check out tomorrow.” I said, while I pulled a table.

“Are you here for just vacation or are you a backpacker?”

“Vacation. And I go back to the Philippines tomorrow”

“I hope you had a great time in Singapore.”

And the conversation went on until we finished fixing the place.

I wanted to watch more movies that night, so I asked her to setup the TV in the lounge, and she did before we said goodbye.

At the lounge I watched “Jeff, Who Lives At Home” and a few guys joined me. There was one guy from Japan, one guy from India, and one guy from the UK. We all had a great time with the film. It was a feel good film.

The movie finished at 11PM and they all said goodnight after.

I was the only person left at the lounge. And then I felt lonely and depressed again.

I needed comfort. I needed to feel wanted. Please don’t judge me with the next part of the story.

Singapore had a lot of Gay Saunas. And I googled the nearest one. There was Keybox. It was two blocks away from Arab St. I went there. I paid $10 for the membership.


It was my first time at a gay sauna. People go there to hookup. There were beds, dark rooms, a sauna, jacuzzi, and a lounge.

The place was full of half-naked guys at the time. It was a mix of different kinds of men. There were guys my age, older guys, foreigners, bears, and twinks, and muscle men.

Everybody was looking at me. Maybe they sensed it was my first time at a sauna. Or maybe they all knew I was new and that got them excited. Well, you know, I’m good-looking so I don’t blame them.

I liked the attention. Especially after being rejected by the one person I loved the most.

But I wasn’t interested with any of them. I kept seeing Paul’s face.

I got into the jacuzzi and there was one guy who was already there. I didn’t look at his face. I was a little embarrassed being naked in a jacuzzi with someone else – but that was so much better than being all alone at the hostel lounge.

I was just enjoying the water, YES HONESTLY. JUST THE WATER.

And then the guy suddenly moved near me. And nearer. And nearer. Until he was already sitting beside me.

I looked at him and he smiled at me.

“Hello, I’m Malik” he said.

He looked pinoy. But his accent said otherwise.

“Hi Im Kristian.”

He reminded me of a celebrity, I didnt know who.

“How are you?” he said.

“Good how are you” I said back.

“Same” he said. “Well, a little tired… I just finished my service in the military.”

“Rayver Cruz.” I said out loud.


“Nothing, you were saying?” And we continued to chat.

He reminded me of Rayver Cruz. A moreno version of Rayver Cruz. Yes, those darling lips, and cute eyes, all said Rayver Cruz.

He wasnt trying to touch me, which I appreciated. We were both naked in that jacuzzi, but we weren’t doing anything sexual to each other.

We chatted about him being in the military service and how it was required of him. And we talked about Malaysia, where his family is from, and we talked about the Philippines.

Then he asked me what I was doing in Singapore alone. He was a stranger. A really really cute stranger who was nice to me. I wouldn’t lose anything if I told him my story so I did.

I was on the verge of tears, but I was trying to hold it back. I was still making kwento, when he suddenly kissed me.

I was shocked.

“You deserve better.” He said.

(to be continued…)